Teachers returned to school for my district yesterday. It was super fun to see everyone and reconnect. It’s been a busy and not so positive summer and I was greeted with lots of hugs and smiles, which was great. But let me tell you… Holy awkward. Awkward for me. Not awkward because other people made it that way… just me and my…. awkwardness. While at home, we’re all “she” and “Sarah”, not everyone knows about “she” and “Sarah” at school. We have a ton of new teachers on our campus, which is awesome, and even some of the teachers that aren’t new, I don’t talk to regularly so they don’t know about our family transition. I was lost on what to say and which pronouns and names for who… Awkward. At one point during an ice breaker, I got paired up with two coworkers… one I know well and has followed our story and one that I rarely talk to. I had to tell who I live with. Awkwardly, I said, “my wife, two boys, two cats and a dog”. The one who doesn’t know me as well gave me a “huh?” look. I didn’t know what to say, so I’m really not saying anything at all… and I’ve done a lot of explaining. I’m trying not to make it sound like I’m justifying anything… because I’m not… but I feel like I am.
Do I just straight up tell people who don’t know? Wait for them to ask? Let them wonder? See? Additional awkward for an already awkward person. It makes for a good (awkward) time. Ha.
For the most part, I’m saying “wife”, but I feel like I constantly have to explain myself… especially to people who don’t “know” me, but know I’m married and as far as they know, to a man. It’s confusing!!! I know people are talking… and that’s ok. It’s positive. I know it is.
I also sat down today with the boys’ teachers and explained our new living situation. It made me happy to hear that three of the four of them had already read our blog, so “Hi amazing teachers!!!! I’m super excited for this year!!! You all are awesome!!”
So saying “wife”… it’s coming along. It’s easy with people I’m comfortable with but it’s hard for me with people I don’t know as well… especially people I see daily but don’t know our situation. It’s getting easier though. I’m continually surprised by all the love and support we’ve received. Sarah hasn’t officially gone back yet but will next week. She’s had a few meetings and inservices with various subgroups of other teachers and it’s gone really well and everyone has been totally cool with her. Thank goodness.
She also officially changed her Facebook name to Sarah yesterday! How exciting!!! I love her to pieces and I’m constantly so proud of her and her willingness to be herself no matter what. What an amazing role model for our children and everyone else’s that we shape every day.
IG: @jenniberr
FB: JenniBerr